Welcome to Memorial Day, the American holiday that supposedly celebrates the sacrifices of the men and women who have served our country in the various armed forces. What are you doing to commemorate this day?

You’re enjoying the day off from work, aren’t you? Don’t lie to the screen — the Screen Sees All.

Are you honouring veterans with potato salad and watermelon? Did you light the grill to thank a soldier?

In Weber We Trust

While I do reflect on those who have served our country on this day, I prefer to think of it in levels of honour, not as a blanket thankfulness. Most people classifiy this day (and Veteran’s Day) as a day to thank any serviceperson who has ever been a part of one of the armed organizations. I think this is unfair and, frankly, rude to some of those who have given more than others.

Level 4 – Very Little Honour: These are the folks who voluntarily chose to go into the armed forces as either a career choice or because they “didn’t know what else to do”. The unmotivated, directionless masses of high school graduates that pick the military over sitting in a cardboard box and smoking gutterweed. They serve their four years, do some grunting at boot camp, and basically exit with a bit more discipline, money, and a lot of parenting courtesy of the US government. These people chose to do what they did and don’t deserve more than a curt nod on a day like today. Nothing impressive here, folks.

Level 3 – A bit of Honour: The same as the above, except they get sent into a conflict and fight and perhaps die in action. These folks deserve a bit more than a nod because they actually did something as opposed to just bunking with Uncle Sam for a few years. Good job on that. But at the end of the day, if you got hurt or damaged, you asked for it — you chose this as your career, you accepted the risk. I dislike those people who give these people accolades because they wanted to do this. If you go into the military and hope to have a desk job, good luck on that, in this day and age nothing is guaranteed. If I go into skyscraper building, there’s a chance that I’ll fall and die on the job. If you are a coal miner, you run the chance of being buried alive. If you’re in the military, you might get shot and killed. Tough nails.

Level 2 – Honourable: These are the folks that, in a time of great need for our country, these people volunteered to go fight to defend the country and/or the world. These are people like my great uncle who faked their age to get into the air force in WWII and thousands of others like him that stepped up when the threat was highest. These folks are due a lot of salutes and songs on the day and a fond remembrance by the masses, for they applied themselves when the need was great.

Level 1 – A Great Honour: These are the highest of veterans to honour by us — the ones that went into service involuntarily, the draftees, conscriptors, the ones torn from their lives and family, whether or not they believed in the cause being fought for, they sacrificed their sanity, their health, and quite often their lives. These are the folks I shed tears for at the Vietnam Memorial, the ones I envision when I see the monuments and edifices built to honour them, the ones I think of when the flags march down the street and the rifles fire salute. These are the people who deserve most of our thoughts, gratitude, and applause.

So, on this Memorial Day, I urge you to enjoy yourselves, but think fondly of those that spent their sunny, summer days in a trench because their country forced them to do so, who dodged bullets in the jungle not out of choice, who instead of munching on succulent burgers fresh from a grill choked down dry rations in the cold rain. These folks did what was necessary to ensure that your right to grill, eat sugared tomatoes, and rip corn from a cob on a beautiful day didn’t come to an end.

And we are eternally grateful for that.